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WELLNESS JOURNAL

6 Simple Steps To Conquering Fear Of Change.

4/10/2018

 
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Fear of failure and fear of the unknown often hold us back from wellness.

​In my last entry I talked about the importance of committing to change in order to meet wellness goals and how resistance
​to fear can affect us on that journey.
Today I am going to dig deeper into the 6 very simple steps to conquering fear. 

Let's begin where the choice to find balance in wellness was made.

​
​For some of us that may have been today,
others may have made the choice last week and still others may have made the choice last year. For some of us this may be our first attempt at finding wellness in a natural, holistic way.
Others may have had many knock down,
drag out fights with their dis-ease(s).

Ultimately, we all have very different dis-eases and different histories of dealing with them, and that is okay!
​The important thing for all of us to remember is that we are capable of great victories in our wellness, and we are all capable of overcoming what we might see as past failures.  

Deciding to take on wellness (again) and therefore change
can seem... overwhelming. It is not unusual to question our ability to meet our goals, to resist upheaval of our routines or to simply fear the unknown! I have one simple tried and true solution to share with you today which can help you conquer your fears! 
Are you ready?

Take baby steps.
​
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Small steps can manifest BIG change!

​​Yes, that's it! Remember... our dis-ease(s) did not happen overnight or even during the course of weeks. Our dis-ease built up over the course of months, maybe even years! So, think about it, how is it fair to pressure our minds, bodies, hearts or spirits into healing in less time than it took our dis-ease to manifest? 

In just a bit I will give you the 6 steps to conquer your fear of change but I must explain something very important to you first. When I say "conquer", that does not necessarily mean that the fear will go away, although it may. What I do mean is that you will beat it! That although you are dealing with whatever profound and negative emotion fear stirs up in you, you are going to be armed with tools (in the form of information) to overcome.
And overcome you will!

Okay, so here they are.
​The 6 simple steps to conquering fear.

​

1. Don't try to do it all at once. 
​

In one word, Balance.
Whatever is it that you are working on and whatever your goal,
I guarantee that there is more than just one change that needs to be made.  Don't jump in and tackle everything all at once. Start with one thing at a time, or two should you be faced with several changes that need to be made.

You must discipline yourself to work for balance in all areas,
particularly when you are working on change. That said, you should avoid being rigid in what "balance" looks like, because it is not always a perfectly tipped scale.


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​The beauty of balance is that even if it doesn't look perfectly tipped all the time... you feel the harmony of its gentle sway.
We are all capable of way more than we know.
​Truly capable of anything!
But... not everything all at once.
Knowing your physical/emotional/spiritual limits,
being gentle with yourself and aiming for balance, these are the actions that you need to take in order to find that sway.

This way you set yourself up for successfully completing your goals. You can add on additional areas of change at your discretion (or that of your wellness coach/practitioner/physician).
​Which leads me to the next step.

​
​

2. Set short term goals to help you build
up to the long-term goal.


If you say things like "I want to lose 3 dress sizes", or "I want to sleep through the night without prescription drugs", or "I want to do a 45-minute meditation practice without my mind wandering"...
these statements set you up for failure.
Here's why.

You are jumping straight the end goal without a plan and there is no marker for accountability. Here are ways to re-word those goals to make them more easily digestible.
 "I want to be a dress size smaller by the New Year" or, "I want to get to bed earlier and work on falling asleep naturally within the next two months", or "I want to meditate 5 minutes a day for a month without my mind wandering and then work up towards longer practices". 
​
These short-term goals not only give you a lessor load,
​which will boost your confidence when you meet them,
but will they also give you a deadline.
Something to hold you accountable. 


3. Reward yourself.

PictureBeing willing to reward yourself and celebrate your triumphs plays a major roll in your long term success!












​Each time you knock one of your short-term goals out of the park, and you will, reward yourself!

This one is pretty self-explanatory, but it's one that many of us often forget. We are working hard, we are conquering fear and we are gaining wellness but we never reward ourselves!!
Going and buying a new pair of jeans, a glass of wine with your bestie or a night out on the town with your significant other, these things are important!

​Not only as a reward system but also to reiterate WHY you are working towards wellness!  Each time you reach a short-term goal, you will feel better and better! (Maybe not at the very beginning as it does often times get worse before it gets better. This will be talked about in detail in a future journal entry.)
​
What better way to reward yourself than by showing yourself how great you look in those jeans or how much energy you have the night you have a celebratory drink with friends!

​

​4. Keep company with a supportive tribe. 
​

There is no better wrench to throw into the wheels of progress than a loved one who is not supportive of you bettering yourself.  Surround yourself with people who are willing to take
those walks with you, 
encourage you to remove the gluten from your diet,
respect your decision to pass on being around alcohol or support you when the demons your digging up have you
acting not so familiar. 
​
These people (or this person) are fine tools to help you along your path! The boost in the positive energy alone 
will make you feel like a million bucks, as long as you are staying on track. It really stinks when people have loyal and supportive tribe members but they not following through on their goals!
Think about how much harder it would be to stay on course without your tribe cheering for you!

​

5. Show yourself compassion. 


Change alone can be a daunting task but tie it in to the path of emotional, spiritual, mental or phsyiological wellness and you are bound to go through ups and downs. 
Understand and accept that you are not alone in your experience. Not only do you have that super supportive tribe that you kept close but you have the support of your coaches/practitioners/physicians too!  And remember, you are not the first one ever to feel fear, isolation, anxiety or irritation after making to the choice to show up for yourself.  And you won't be the last to make it through!!
​

​Be kind, be gentle and be understanding with yourself.
Even if you are at a low in your journey, keep going and do not under any circumstance resort to negative self-talk. What we think really does end up what we become. 

Be compassionate.
Be loving.
Be well.

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Be gentle with yourself when your path to the lotus has you falling in the mud.


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​6. Stick to it.


You've made the decision to create wellness for yourself and you've committed to the change that will be necessary!
Congratulations!!!

After you decide what things you need to work on and in what order, you designate your short term and long-term goal(s), reward yourself for those little victories, keep only supportive people in your corner and show yourself compassion when things are feeling a bit overwhelming...

The 6th and final step is to stick to it!
Whatever the step is, whatever the goal, it is possible if you stick to it! It's all about breaking patterns. Sticking to your goal until the change is found in your new habit(s) and whe you have transformed from your old patterns. 
​

I wish I could end on a more exciting note for you but it really is that simple. I am not saying that the journey will always be that simple, what I am saying is that the steps to conquering fear of change are just that simple!
Things that we might already do on a regular basis and under different circumstances, things that are easy to remember and not complicated to implement into daily living.
​
Show up for yourself and conquer that fear of change so that
you can commit to the change needed to transform into wellness!

​

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    Author

    Mary Szenasi
    is a transformational & spiritual wellness catalyst, Shadow integration guide, ancestral repair facilitator, published author, childhood sexual abuse advocate, certified aromatherapist, herbalist, esoteric astrologer, ritualist animist, star watcher, moon gazer, healer, student of depth and parapsychology, mother of two beautiful boys and wife to the most fantastic man. 

    MORE ABOUT MARY HERE

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Email: mszenasi@the6thhouse.com

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